Zach Shildwachter, we found ourselves headed to the beautiful AMC River East theater to catch an evening horror movie before dinner. After watching our colleagues explode with positivity all over social networking sites, there was absolutely no doubt that we were going to see The Cabin In The Woods. We ran up the escalators and at 5:58pm we bought tickets for the 6:00pm screening. We didn't even check movie times, this was a sure fire sign that fate had allowed us to catch the flick. On our way into the theater, we were greeted by a duo of sweet old ladies armed with surveys and baby pencils. Lucky us, Lionsgate was interested in our opinion of the film. I sure as hell hope these women actually work for Lionsgate, because I would buy just about anything they were dishing out. The audience was the perfect size and everyone seemed genuinely excited to be there. Unlike some of my more recent theater going experiences (I'm looking at you midnight premiere of The Hunger Games) the audience was actually engaged in what was on the screen rather than sitting balls deep in a round of Draw Something.
The Cabin In The Woods does something very quickly that many modern/mainstream horror films fail to do; develops characters I actually give a rat's ass about. Right off the bat we were given characters that were far more than one dimensional with delightful dialogue that was eerily similar to the conversations I have with my own college buddies. The dialogue throughout the film had a perfect balance of realism, humor, horror, suspense, and curiosity. Not once did I ever feel as if they were getting carried away with references like many have done before (you hearing me, Diablo Cody?). None of the characters ever felt wasted to me and even the smallest of supporting characters were memorable in their moments. I made sure that the special cameo wasn't spoiled for me and that was a very well welcomed surprise. I gotta hand it to all involved because as far as script writing goes, this one is top notch. This is undoubtedly one of the most well conceived horror stories in AT LEAST the last decade.
To put it simply, this film needs to be seen rather than reviewed. It's not that spoiling the plot will destroy any shocking reveals, it's just that watching it unfold is far too exciting of a moment to ruin it for the audience. If you can, please do everything in your power to see this movie. If this film kills in the box office, this will be our message to the movie industry that audiences want more original horror films. This film is worth far more than the $8.00 movie ticket, I promise. The Cabin In The Woods delivers to horror fans absolutely everything new we've been craving on a silver platter of everything about horror that we've already come to know and love. This is the future of horror, ladies and germs. Welcome to it.