Wednesday, August 31, 2011

SWEDISH SENSATIONSFILMS:A CLANDESTINE HISTORY OF SEX, THRILLERS, AND KICKER CINEMA

This is my attempt at writing an introduction to this review without finding myself single-woman circle jerking about the glory that is Let The Right One In.  While we were all completely blown away by the innovative vampire novel/film, we often times forget that there was once a time when the Swedes kicked major, major ass in the film department.  Swedish born author Daniel Ekeroth, has given us an innovative new look on a highly overlooked and underrated movement in genre films with Swedish Sensationsfilms: A Clandestine History of Sex, Thrillers, and Kicker Cinema.   Let me be one to say that homeboy did his homework.  Ekeroth's book is a highly detailed and accurate look into quite possibly one of the most influential and yet under-appreciated underground film movements.

While this may be an informative read, it is anything but boring. Ekeroth has a remarkable sense of humor and has a writing style that makes it difficult to put down.  Ekeroth analyzes over 200 banned films from this movement and complies them all into one comprehensive book of epic proportions.  And for all of you fanboys out there, yes, there are pictures. This is easily one of the top books written on a specific film style set in a certain setting.  It's hard to exactly pinpoint what to call Swedish Sensationsfilms other than exactly that.  Sensationsfilms.  There hasn't been anything like them, and there wasn't anything like them to compare.  He also gives us a personal peek into the career of Christina Lindberg.  Oh yeah, it's from the actress herself.  Thought I might mention that one.  Ekeroth more than exposed his writing chops and passion for the genre, he has proven himself to be a Sensationsfilms master.  If you're even somewhat curious to know even the slightest information about this film movement, consider this your bible.

Monday, August 29, 2011

AND GOD SAID, LET THERE BE TWI-HARDS.

It was a chilly evening in August when I found myself towel bound and compelled to throw out the trash accumulating in the back of my dorm room. Groggily, I stumbled down the hallway amidst the echoes of one night stands and those paying their respects to the porcelain God. I stood in front of the garbage chute and disposed of the empty Cheez-It boxes and spaghetti-o cans. Suddenly, it was silent. I stretched my body upward as I let out a yawn and out of my peripheral ...I saw it.  It stood calmly and almost appeared to let out an ominous glow from the end of the hallway.  I found myself caught in its grasp and was uncontrollably drawn to it.  "This...this can't be real.  Only out of my darkest nightmares have I been burdened with something this horrific." I thought to myself.  As the fog from my eyes cleared and my mind allowed me to focus on the terror at hand, I saw it.  
Your eyes are not deceiving you.  What stands before you is the door of a twenty two year old twi-hard.  I firmly believe that this is karma biting me in the ass for constantly ridiculing Twatlight fanatics.  My punishment for having a passion for intellectually destroying anyone obsessed with this shitstorm of a franchise is that for the rest of this year, I have a jarring omen to ruin my whole day.


I hate college.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

I'm in college, leave me alone.


Dance crazes traveling like a Zombie Outbreak.
Hell. Yes.

Monday, August 22, 2011

BJ-C'S HORROR MOVIE RECOMMENDATION LIST FOR THE INEXPERIENCED COLLEGE STUDENT V.2

Ah, the collegiate environment.  As the stale odor of Keystone lingers over the air, the sound of bustling backpacks and shuffling feet can be heard above the chatter on campuses all across the country.  I spent most of my morning sitting amongst sleepy eyed co-eds and trying to figure out "something interesting about myself" to recite in front of my fellow peers rather than attempting to slit my wrists with my syllabus out of pure boredom.  Like most first days, my "interesting" fact is a shameless plug for this blog.  I've made plenty of pals and at the very least, intrigued most of my professors with Day of the Woman.  With a new year brings new opportunities for BJ-C to enlighten the horror challenged youth of Illinois.  With that being said, sharpen your pencils and be sure to pay attention.  This is the annual (and updated) list of horror films geared towards the inexperienced college kid.

CLASSICS
If there's anything I've learned from being in the collegiate environment, it's that anyone born after 1985 seems to have absolutely zero knowledge whatsoever on horror films made before their time. It's weird to comprehend this, but yes, there are people out there who haven't ever seen a horror film in black in white or without computer effects.  Like any History professor will teach you, it's important to know where you came from in order to figure out where you're going.
  • Psycho (1960)
  • Rosemary's Baby (1968)
  • Carnival of Souls (1962)
  • The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)
  • Nosferatu (1922)
  • Faust (1926)
  • The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920) 
  • FREAKS! (1932)
  • Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956)
  • The Birds (1963)
FOREIGN LANGUAGE
One of the more depressing facts of the horror genre is coming to terms with the fact that some of the greatest horror films in existence aren't in English.  Honestly, a good percent of College Americans are just too damn lazy to read freaking subtitles.  However, there are some films too spectacular to look past and deserve their recommendations.  It's very common to require a foreign language course as a graduation requirement, and for that reason alone, it's important for us to integrate foreign horror into our horror required viewings.
  • Let The Right One In (2008)
  • Audition (1999/2000)
  • The Orphanage (2007)
  • Inside (2007)
  • [REC] (2007)
  • Man Bites Dog (1992)
  • Eyes Without A Face (1959)
  • A Tale of Two Sisters (2003)
  • Les Diaboliques (1954)
  • The Devil's Backbone (2001)
GHOSTS
It doesn't matter how many horror movies I sit through, there's always something much more frightening about the thought of something actually happening.  Even if people claim not to believe in them, everyone at some point, has been afraid of ghosts.  Whether it be the illustrations from the Alvin Schwartz children's books or the tales told around a campfire, ghosts are a commonplace occurance for fear.  There's something about the possibility of what goes bump in the night to be someone...something else.  The mystery of what becomes of us after we leave this life is a seemingly universal fear for everyone, and ghost movies exploit that fear better than anything.

  • Lady in White (1988)
  • The Changeling (1980)
  • Paranormal Activity (2009)
  • The Shining (1980)
  • Lake Mungo (2010)
  • The Haunting (1963)
  • The Orphanage (2007)
  • Poltergeist (1982)
  • Session 9 (2001)
  • The Amityville Horror (1979)

ZOMBIES
Alright, let's face it.  There is absolutely nothing greater in the world of horror movie monsters, than zombies.  Zombies are the kings of the horror world and I don't see them losing their crown anytime soon.  (Suck it, Edward) Even people who hate horror movies understand the workings and the concept behind our undead favorites. The plus side of the zombie being such a popular creature is the plethora of zombie films being cranked out every year. The downside...they're not all good.  It's important to make sure that our inexperienced college brethren are picking up the RIGHT zombie films from Family Video, we wouldn't want them taking home a dud. NOTE: Some of these films are arguably not "zombie" films, but "virus" films.  Screw it, this isn't comic-con. They don't care. They just want hordes. 
  • Romero's Night/Dawn/Day of the Dead (1968/1977/1985)
  • Zombi 2 (1979)
  • ...28 Days Later (2002)
  • Dawn of the Dead (2004)
  • Return of the Living Dead (1985)
  • Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things (1972)
  • Versus (2000)
  • Deadgirl (2008)
  • Pontypool (2009)
  • Dellamorte, Dellamore (1994)
COMEDY
Believe it or not, there is a huge following for horror comedies.  The combination of laughing and screaming seem to entertain the masses.  While most horror comedies tend to be run by the zombie genre, there are plenty of other comedy horror flicks to tickle your fancy. Horror comedies seem to be like the zombie, in that just about everyone loves them. Horror comedies also come in handy when dealing with someone who isn't all that familiar with horror films or tends to scare easily.  It's a nice gateway into the realm we all love so dearly.
  • An American Werewolf In London (1981)
  • Fright Night (1985)
  • Evil Dead II (1987)
  • Shaun of the Dead (2004)
  • Zombieland (2009)
  • Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)
  • Night of the Creeps (1986)
  • Young Frankenstein (1974)
  • Slither (2006)
  • The Burbs (1989)
SLASHER

Probably the most well-known of the horror genres, college kids seem to eat up slasher films.  With unique kills, sassy dialogue, and the ever entrancing final girls seem to drive straight up young adult alleys.  The sad thing is that most people my age recognize slashers as something concocted by Rob Zombie (or an absolutely dreadful remake company), and all of the great ones go unnoticed.
  • Candyman (1992)
  • Black Christmas (1974)
  • Halloween (1978)
  • Scream (1996)
  • A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
  • The House on Sorority Row (1983)
  • Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2007)
  • Alice, Sweet Alice (1976)
  • American Psycho (2000)
  • Friday The 13th (Screw it, just pick one)
SCI-FI

Everyone knows that college is filled with more than its fair share of nerds.  After the countless unnecessary GenEd's of the biologies and the computer sciences, it's nice to see the sci-fi work in a more entertaining fashion.  And what do nerds love more than science fiction? Horror of course! You add a little horror to the mix, and you've got something that appeals to more than just the protractor posse!  No offense of course, most of my best friends are nerds....Anyway, sci-fi and horror seem to go hand and hand.  It is by combining these two forces that we are given some of the best horror films in existence.

  • Videodrome (1983)
  • The Thing (1982)
  • Alien (1979)
  • Event Horizon (1997)
  • Lifeforce(1985)
  • They Live (1987)
  • It Came From Outer Space (1953)
  • The Blob (1988)
  • Scanners (1981)
  • The Fly (1986)
GORE
There really isn't much that needs to be said.  College kids are a simple breed with simple expectations and simple amusements.  There's no easier way to amuse the sick and twisted little minds of the future's best and brightest than to smother the screen in blood and guts.  It seems that college kids have all been struck by the Saw & Hostel bugs but haven't really seen anything gorier than that.  There are some films like Cannibal Holocaust that I'd never recommend to a college crowd, but that isn't to say there aren't gory gems that need to be seen by the masses!
  • Re-Animator (1985)
  • Dead Alive (1994)
  • House of 1000 Corpses (2003)
  • The Beyond (1981)
  • City of the Living Dead (1980)
  • Tokyo Gore Police (2008)
  • Cannibal Holocaust (1980)
  • Ichi The Killer (2001)
  • The Beyond (1981)
  • Tenebre (1982)


 CLASS IS DISMISSED!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Thursday, August 11, 2011

WIU FEATURES BJ-C AND DAY OF THE WOMAN!

WARNING: THIS IS AN EXTREMELY GRATUITOUS POST
I've had this since about April, but I've finally gotten around to showing the hard copy of it.  My school (Western Illinois University) has a literary magazine every semester and last semester, yours truly was one of the featured topics.  Sophomore journalism student, Alyse Thompson, thought I was cool enough for an interview and I was given a two page spread.  

Just thought I'd share :)

Thursday, August 4, 2011

VAMPIRES I'D LET BITE ME

Now that Harry Potter has finished their film series, my news feed seems to have been taken over with statuses similar to (and possibly directly quoting) "NOW THAT HARRY IS OVER, IT'S TIME TO RBING BACK EDWARD CULLEN!!!" I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. I'm really, really not.  I don't know who had the bright idea to compare Harry Potter to Edward Cullen, because they're nowhere near on the same wavelength.  I digress.  I've been wanting to show these tween idiots what a REAL sexy vampire man looks like, and I think now is the perfect opportunity.
Eric Northman can draw my blood, any day.
TRUE BLOOD



I don't even need to be one of the children of the night to make music with Bela Lugosi
 DRACULA

David: The only person who ever made a mullet sexy.
THE LOST BOYS

I would do terrible things in the name of Jerry Dandridge
FRIGHT NIGHT



I remember when you started the fire in Chicago, Severen...it was between my loins.
NEAR DARK

Do...Want....I'll even let Lestat join the party. I'm feeling generous today.
INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE


but the motherload...
http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbmmufxmor1qzvu53o1_500.gif 
Yeah...this should just be a crime. I need to go now. 
QUEEN OF THE DAMNED


Now,  everyone knows that BJ-C is a zombie lover before a vampire lover.  However, I'd be a lying fool if I didn't admit that the vampire genre has the sex appeal the zombie genre just can't capture in the same right.  There's something so attractive about the soft skin, strong cheekbones, pearly whites, and danger that come associated with a vampire.  I can't exactly pin-point why it is so intriguing, I'm a little distracted by the above picture.  How about you?  What vampires would you let bite you?
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