Wednesday, October 5, 2011

IF YOU LIKED ______ YOU'LL LOVE ______

Now that Halloween has been peeking its little head around the corner, it's also become the time where I find myself bombarded with friends asking for movie recommendations for the frightful nights to come.  If I'm being completely honest, I've discovered something ridiculous.  My friends are cowards.  Seriously! Instead of trusting my judgement and recommendations, I'm stuck listening to "Well...I really liked ________ do you know anything like that?"  Most of the ________ films are usually some mainstream garbage cranked out by Anchor Bay and I am left shaking my head and trying to plead with them to watch something else.  So now...I present you SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.
If you liked PROM NIGHT, you'll love THE LOVED ONES
I still haven't been able to wrap my finger around it, but there's an overwhelming amount of the collegiate population that found themselves scared by the remake of Prom Night.  Apparently, they can easily identify with how teenagers treat Senior Prom like some monumental event in their lives that they believe will actually matter in ten years.  Oh well.  Australians have been really picking up their game when it comes to horror, and they further proved it in 2009 with The Loved Ones.  While not as much of a party filled prom as the Brittany Snow edition, this film shows what happens when you turn down an invitation from the quiet girl at school.  Spoiler Alert: Don't decline invitations from the quiet girls at school. They don't take it well...
If you liked TWILIGHT, you'll love NEAR DARK
Okay, I'm sort of stretching it on this one considering most Twi-hards have some sort of brain damage.  If I'm going to rat on how much Twatlight blows, I should at least be able to combat their obsession with a proper horror equivalent.  Near Dark is exactly what Twilight would be if Stephenie Meyer understood vampire folklore, wasn't Mormon, and had the talent to write a decent storyline.  A vampire love story of epic proportions, this film is jam packed with fabulous one-liners, vampires BURNING in the sunlight, and a test to see how far someone is willing to go for love.
If you liked THE RING, you'll love A TALE OF TWO SISTERS
I don't know why, but Americans really have some sort of issue with creepy dark haired women.  While vastly different from The Ring, this South Korean import deals with tragic deaths within a family and the horrifying events that take place shortly after.  The film has beautiful imagery, some unsettling nightmare scenes, and a pretty decent amount of spookiness paired with an eerily wonderful score.  Seriously, trust me on this one.
If you liked CABIN FEVER, you'll love SPLINTER
Eli Roth did to shaving your legs what JAWS did to swimming in the ocean.  I see his flesh eating bacteria and raise him a "Thing-esque" plague.  Overlooked gross-out film Splinter has moments that genuinely made me squeal out of my seat.  Ladies and Germs, that doesn't happen very often.  Without spoiling it, there is one in particular that got an audible reaction out of me.  Watch it, and you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.
 If you liked SAW, you'll love DREAD
Okay, there's no madman hell-bent on teaching lessons and there's no unnecessary gore.  The torture in this film is far more cruel than anything Jigsaw could concoct.  Think of what you're most afraid of.  I mean, really REALLY afraid of.  Now think about someone using that against you to the nth degree for no other reason than to ruin your life.  Add that to the uber sexy Jason Rathbone, and you've got yourself a movie.

Like these lists?  Let me know and I'll be sure to create more of them for you.  Comment with suggestions and I'll be sure to crank out more through the month of October!

5 comment(s):

DrunkethWizerd said...

Near darks? Nevur herd of it. Does that have any hot sparkling guys in it?

Unknown said...

How great is Robin McLeavy as Lola in The Loved Ones?! I've never seen Dread, but the rest of your picks are all great. I loved the scene in Splinter when the girlfriend kept slamming her body up against the glass window of the convenience store. Shit's intense.

Renee said...

wow, i love your taste. i just started following your blog and you are so awesome.

when i met my now-fiance, he really got me into foreign horror, specifically asian horror. i had seen the remakes: the ring, the grudge, and the sequels of those two. he showed me a tale of two sisters and i fell in love. such a beautiful movie.. i hadn't seen anything like it at the time.

and as for dread.. oh man. that movie is amazingly sick. i could not stop thinking about it for weeks after i saw it. so amazing. i love that you're trying to get people into better movies by playing on their popular somewhat-counterparts. i knew i made the right move by following your blog.

Kev D. said...

If you liked "Dolphin Tale" you'll love well, probably a movie about talking dogs or something.

Great feature, by the way.

Unknown said...

I'm overjoyed to hear someone else finally give Dread some love.

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