Thursday, May 28, 2009

Twilight "Twatlight" ruins my MTV

Alright, so as much as I'd like to act oh so mature for my age and claim that I only watch Dateline and Frasier, I have to admit...I'm a teenage girl. I get a really sick kick out of watching their shows. Hold your Stones...I DO NOT WATCH THE HILLS. I however do watch an excessive amount of True Life which is their attempt at documentaries and Parental Control. If you haven't watched it, Parental Control is DAMN funny. The parents hate their kid's boyfriend/girlfriend so they set their kid up on blind dates with people they've selected. The current beau has to watch the dates in the living room on TV with the parents. It's fucking great.

My daily fix of having parents call teenagers "trash assholes" was TERRIBLY and OH SO RUDELY interrupted by none other than TWATLIGHT. Apparently MTV is getting some exclusive sneak peek for New Moon and feels necessary to advertise it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW. Um. Hello. THAT'S WHAT A COMMERCIAL IS FOR. This isn't American Idol, you're not allowed to advertise in the middle of the show. That's just not right. What's worse is that they don't pause the show and shove it in, no. I can still hear what's going on in the show, but I'm forced to look at Edward *not a real vampire* Cullen and Bella *oh so angsty* whateverthefuck.

MTV has had enough problems with not showing music anymore, but lately, they are hanging off the perverial Twilight tit for much too long. Call it "marketing synergy" or what have you, but it's god damn annoying. Even some of my friends who are sadly, Twatlighters have admitted to it being annoying.

To make matters worse. I just found this blog, and I'm about to vomit all over myself.
HOW DARE ANYONE PUT NOSFERATU ON THE SAME BANNER AS TWILIGHT. I understand its a vampire and horror geared site but DAMN. In this case they used the word "Twilight" I'm sure only as a cynical way to get a lot of hits. But yeah, sacrilege of the highest order.

i hate my generation

PS; I just realized today that Kristen Stewart is trying to be Heather Langenkamp by using the same face in every picture....doesn't work.

8 comment(s):

Johnny said...

The ultimate Twilight related sacrilege thus far for me is the cover of the upcoming Lionsgate re-release of Near Dark on DVD....

It's gone too far!

B-Sol said...

That picture, with the words "I hate my generation"... pretty much sums it up. Thank you, Miss BJ-C, on behalf of all of us readers born before 1985, for being the exception to the rule!
And I gave up on MTV by about 1998, so what do I know?

Oh yeah, and Twatlight sucks ass!!

That is all.

BJ-C said...

Johnny-OH MY GOD. I just vomited a little bit.

Scott said...


Nice to see that a gal, and a teen at that, doesn't like Twilight.

Nice have excellent taste in films, from what I can see here. Keep up the good work! Take care!

Anonymous said...

You never cease to brighten my day lady!What is with that 'Near Dark' rubbish, it almost looks like porn? But you know bad porn... cough cough ;)

Ms Harker

BJ-C said...

Um, you're crazy. There is NO such thing as bad porn.

B-Sol said...

You obviously never saw the John Wayne Bobbitt video....

*douche chills*

Anonymous said...

Ahaha... oh, the irony. Because you popped up in the google results for "twatlight", and because of the snippet it actually quoted, I totally thought you were going to be some whiny kid bitching about the Twats pranking MTV or something. I am intensely glad to know it's the opposite, and that it was a spontaneous derogatory pun that in context was most heartily deserved.

You'll be perhaps amused to know that there is actually an entire online community of puckish, fun-loving (and, interestingly enough, largely female) folks that poke fun at Twilight and the die-hard Twihards every chance they get (they're made up of maybe 70% People Who Completely Loath Twilight, 15-20% People Who Think Twilight Is So Bad Its Good, In That Hilariously Failtastic Way, and maybe 15-20% of lighthearted Twi-fans who either treat it like the Guilty Pleasure is is or can otherwise just Have a Laugh About it With No Hard Feelings. It's a frequently silly and often surprisingly low-brow group, but nonetheless kind of awesome, in its own delightfully quasi-stupid, frequently OT sorta way).

And this community is, yes, called "Twatlight" (or, specifically it's "ONTD Twatlight", since it was originally spawned from posts on the Livejournal community Oh No They Didn't. But pretty much everybody just calls it Twatlight). They call themselves "Twats" for short. I'm technically still a "Twat" myself, though I haven't posted there in forever.

Also fun fact: Robert Pattinson hates his own fandom. Or at least the Twihard part (no, really. He exited the first ComicCon panel on Twilight noting in the most shaken voice you can imagine, "It was like the sound you hear at the gates of Hell." Rumor has it he rarely bathes or washes his hair now, in a largely ineffectual attempt to keep the fangirls at a more respectable distance). This has led to him actually being apparently fond of Twatlight. - he actually autographed a poster "to Twatlight" once, quite cheerfully and noting "I know you guys!". I think he considers Twatlight a slight respite from the crazy he has to deal with nowadays.

Just thought you might enjoy that little bit of trivia. :)

Also, I may just friend you on Facebook. You seem cool.

Related Posts with Thumbnails