Monday, May 25, 2009

the somewhat long awaited...MOVIE RECOMMENDATIONS FROM DAY OF THE WOMAN! pt. 5


This will contain some classics, some cliches, some slashers, some thrillers, some that make you feel like you need drugs, some that make you feel like you're on drugs, and some that you just may not have ever seen before. It's also going to be a continuing page. I'll probably post one every Monday for a good while until I reach like...250 films or something. So make sure you come back soon :)

SO I BRING TO YOU... THE MOVIES BJ-C WILL TIE YOU TO A CHAIR AND MAKE YOU WATCH IF YOU COME TO VISIT HER... results may vary.

Part 1-(1-25)| Part 2-(26-50) | Part 3-(51-75) | Part 4-(76-100)

101) The Fly:
Before we were graced with Cronenberg's masterpiece, we were brought this fabulous film. Making the super cool transporting devices of the space age into something completely horrific, we see what happens if just the smallest thing goes wrong with genetic transfers. However, we should be lucky he was just a fly-man. BUT, what if he became...BATMAN. *starts writing play*

102) 13 Ghosts:
In case you were wondering, William Castle is a frickin genius. Before the dude from Monk and Matthew Lillard made a jab at the horror genre, we had this original work of masterpiece. Even cooler is that the film had special glasses to see in the theatres so you could see the ghosts. Awesome. SOOO awesome. I personally love the headless one the best.

103) Salem's Lot:
Stephen King sure knows exactly how to freak us out. He's not just the King of horror literature, he's also the king of the mini-series. While many people disregard mini-series based off of other things, Stephen King has made a living off of it. Two of his biggest sellers were mini-series. IT and well...this one. The story is of vampires and it really freaks me out. I think its that damn kid in the window. I'd prefer a peeping tom than this little punk.


104) Peeping Tom:
Speaking of peeping toms, that is ALSO a damn good film. More psychological than anything it showed us a twisted world of voyerism, and just weird junk. The guy is a serial murderer who uses his handy dandy cam to capture every bit of expression before someone dies. That shit is weird. What's even sicker is that there are people who have actually done this, which is so twisted on so many levels. Hey, I guess that's what the difference between horror and psychological thrillers is....

105) Saw:
Yes, hate on me all you'd like, but love it or hate it...this series is going to be my generation's horror accomplishment. The later films aren't as good in my opinion, but then again...we keep shelling out the dough to see the twisted ways Jigsaw rips these people to shreds. You must remember though, the first film of the series was so unlike anything the horror genre was putting out there, not to mention has an AWESOME ending. That is all.

106) The Wicker Man:
If you're looking for the Nicholas Cage version, I highly suggest you get yourself medicated heavily and call your recent partners and tell them they may need to be checked out. This film has Pagan cults, some public bonking, Britt Eklunds ass for a good amount of time, and oh yeah that creepy gravedigger guy. This film is amazing and I will say I have to thank the shit-tacular Nicholas Cage film because without it, I never would have tracked down the original. Thank Moses I did.

107) The Happening:
YES, YOU READ CORRECTLY, I AM RECOMMENDING YOU TO SEE THIS FILM. I personally love all of M. Night's films (except Lady in the Water). I really do. I love his cheesy twists, I love everything about his work. People gave this film so much shit because "it could have been better" but hey, he gave a really original idea. Screw the acting, screw the text, screw Zooey Deschansel, I LIKE this film, and I think everyone should watch it at least once.

108) Basket Case:
I Love Monsters. I love them, I love them, I love them. I love big ones, small ones, some as big as your head, all of them. Especially ones that hide out in pik-a-nick baskets, Ay Boo Boo? I also love films that have budgets that wouldn't be able to afford a VS bra for my birthday. This film is RIGHT up my alley. It's got over the top gore, lack of funds, and a weird evil twin sort of thing being carried around and killing people. The acting is awful, the FX are bootleg, buuuuut, It's awesome, I love it, go watch.

109) Frankenstein: Frankie is my favorite of the monsters. I don't know why. When he wasn't out destroying stuff, he had such a little charm to him. I always found him to be the most endearing and even as a little monster myself, I used to do the 'frankenstein' walk around my house. Maybe its the feminine side of me, but I think Frankenstein is adorable. Plus, Karloff is GENIUS in the original. It's possibly the greatest mime performance ever.



110) Child's Play:
I hate Chucky. There, I said it. It's not that I hate the films, I just hate the damn doll. Not the possessed one, just the Good Guy doll. I had such nightmares from that fucking doll. I hate big eyes, I hate gingers, and I hate dolls that talk. Whoever was like "hey, lets make him a ginger doll" I hate you. At the same time though, I have to love you...because I don't think Chucky would have been nearly as terrifying.


111) The Hills Have Eyes:
So I'm on this "recommend the original and not the remake" kick ever since I did The Vault of Horror's round table, and I'm shocked i didn't mention this one. No one can touch Michael Berryman, no one. I don't care if you were born with 26 birth defects, you are the most badass horror movie actor. Talk about taking lemons and making lemonade. This guy took lemons, and made BANK and made himself an icon. It'd be one thing if he couldn't act, but...HE CAN! I love him. And his portrayal of Pluto is him at his finest.

112) Threads:
Say it with me: NU-CLE-ER. This film is absolutely insane.
The film is so believable in its documentary style depiction that one can get sucked in and truly believe what is happening. No other movie shows how god damn terrifying nuclear war really is. I believe it is a good deterrent as to why such weapons should never be used again. Movies normally can't ever change my political standpoint, but this one does a damn good job. Eat your heart out Michael Moore.

113) Faust:
Oh you think you're a horror expert cause you've seen Nosferatu? Well, if you really wanna prove yourself, here's another Murnau movie...According to my mentor B-Sol, my having seen this film earned me my "street cred" as far as the horror community is concerned. This film, is a cinematic masterpiece. For it being only the 1920's the special FX are pretty out of this world. That image of the gigantic demon towering over the city is unbelievable. It's breathtaking actually.

114) The Haunting of Emily Rose:
As much as I love The Exorcist and how it did scare the hell out of me, I really enjoyed the realism in this flick. I think I was actually creeped out more by this one because it looked so damn real. I've watched enough exorcisms on the Discovery Channel to know what they look like, and this one did a damn good job. Wish the courtroom scenes weren't so prominent, but I get what they were going for. She also plays my favorite classical piano piece while she's possessed. Always a good thing. Always.

115) Red Eye:
I think I like this film for the sheer fact that Cillian Murphy is in this, and I find him to be quite smexy. I also find him to be a phenomenal actor. He's good at being chased by zombies, and he's damn good at being a quiet hostager. Err...one who takes someone hostage....whatever. The film has its down moments, but it's damn well entertaining and has a really nice amount of suspense running through it.

116) Suspiria:
How the HELL didn't I mention this yet? Oh well. I will firmly say that this film has the SICKEST kill in the history of awesome killing. I don't care what film you bring to me, or what kill you think is better, this one is fucking MINDBLOWING. The film itself is one of the coolest art films I've ever seen, and the storyline is just awesome. I love it, its perfect :)

117) Single, White, Female:
HIGH
HEELED
FUCKING
SPIKED
SHOE.
If you didn't think it was possible for a woman to rape a man, watch this film.

118) American Psycho:
I could recommend this film on Christian Bale's deliciousness alone. (You don't even know the thoughts that run through my head when I see this side picture over to my right...) However, he did pull off a pretty outstanding horror flick and it has a female director. This film is amazing, start to finish. From amazing raincoat dances to Huey Lewis & The News or the whole dropping the chainsaw down the stairs onto someone gag, this film...rules.

119) The Howling:
Yay for more Werewolves!! I read the novel before I saw the film, but I'll tell you...both are pretty nice pieces of work. I must ask though, why would one have sex by a campfire? I mean, I can't imagine that being comfortable or fun. You'd get dirt and sand and shit in places they shouldn't be in. I don't get it. The concept of this film is really cool and puts it as one of my favorite monster flicks. I still don't understand campfire sex!!! But the whole shape shifting aspect is totally bad ass.

120) Rawhead Rex:
Clive Barker is so cool. This film is another reason that proves it. This little dandy was made before Pinhead and the gang showed up in our homes. It's a tale of a monstrous Pagan God's bloody rampage through the Irish countryside. Awesome right? Well, to me-yes. However Clive Barker was dissatisfied with this and this film is the reason he decided that he had to direct Hellraiser. A blessing for him really.

121) Fright Night:
We all know of the ten BILLION zombie comedies, but for once someone made a Vampire comedy (Bordello of Blood need not apply). Chris Sarandon is the coolest of the cool, even before becoming the speaking voice of Jack Skellington. Not to mention giving Susan her fame making last name. The vampires in this film have grins that would make the Joker proud and eyes straight out of a Raimi film. Stellar.
122) Black House:
I'm pretty sure that this is the first showing of Asian horror on this list. If it isn't, sue me. I don't look back every time because that would take much much too long. Whoever said the horror genre was dying, surely hasn't seen this film. Yi-Hwa is a cold blooded killer who maliciously whacks off her husbands (not the good way) in order to obtain their insurance money. It's like that film with Jennifer Love Hewitt and Ripley, but way scarier.

123) Attack of the Killer Tomatoes:
Does this really need an explination? A woman is found dead and covered in not blood...but tomato juice.
Honestly?
They're killer fucking veggie/fruits.
JUST WATCH IT.


124) My Name Is Bruce:
If you're a dedicated reader to my blog and are confused as to why I'm recommending this...You need to be shot in the face. It's Bruce Campbell, all day, every day. There is no need for a synopsis, or a spoiler, or some witty joke about the subject matter. It's Bruce Fucking Campbell. After you've seen this amazingness once, I find the second time to be much more appealing....with the sound off...and the lights off....and the..cloth...*drools*

125) Bad Taste:
As much as my heart fills with glee knowing next semester I'm taking a class devoted entirely to J.R.R. Tolkien and Peter Jackson's adaptations of the novels...I can't help but wish we were studying his splatter flicks. Anyone who says you can't make a highly entertaining, and gruesome flick on a budget; is an idiot. Peter Jackson does it FABULOUSly. It's his first film, and you'd think he'd been doing this stuff for years. Plus, he's in it! Who doesn't want to be saved by AIDS?

11 comment(s):

B-Sol said...

OK, I will say I'm with you on the Saw thing. The original was a breath of fresh air, and blew me away when I first saw it. The sequels have totally besmirched the name of that original, unfortunately. Also, I'd like to point out that Chris Sarandon lives in my town (can you say, "future VoH interview"?)

As for The Happening. Sigh. We will...agree...to disagree :-)

Johnny said...

The Happening, eh? No comment! I really just didn't 'get' it. Well, I guess that was a comment...

I've been seeing pictures of that Rawhead Rex character for years but have never seen the movie. I think I should get on that!

Soap Magic said...

Holy cow, you saw Threads too? I'm glad I'm not the only American who has seen it. I'm just wondering, did I inspire you to recommend it when you saw my Top 50 Horror Movies?

P.S. Do I get street cred for seeing Faust too?
P.S.S Did I help you remember about certain other movies when you saw my Top 50 Horror Movies?

BJ-C said...

Johnny-I know man...I know. I get it alot.

Soap Magic-yes, yes you did little one. I've seen so many films I tend to forget a ton of them so it takes an OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT THAT ONE moment. Yes, you do get street cred, MAD street cred.

Scandy Tangerine Man said...

Emil Jannings was always a phenomenal presence, but his performances in FAUST and THE LAST LAUGH will preserve him as a god in my mind.

hudsonkellymh said...

Okay, we're not gonna fight over Saw, even though I think it's way overrated. I'd take Hostel any day over it--I just think the twist ending isn't that special, but the rest of it isn't bad.

We won't even fight over The Happening. You're right, it's a groovy idea for a movie. I just thought it didn't have a climax as a film. It just...petered out and was over and, well, that's pretty boring.

However, we will fight over Fright Night! Get your gloves on, baby! This movie should be much higher on your list! And for that matter, so should Suspiria. Talk about two films getting it right all the way down the line...

Thanks for your lists. As always, they're fun to read and compare thoughts on.

BJ-C said...

Hudsonkellymh: These lists aren't numbered by significance. I'm just trying to give everyone 250 films to watch before they die :) and i can't make them by significance because then people would hit about film number 45 and then they'd hate me. You gotta mix things up a bit!

Planet of Terror said...

Basket Case is fucking amazing. The part where the little claymation glob starts getting jiggy with the girl is absolutely hilarious.

The Warfreak said...

Right on with The Happening. I happen to like that movie as well. Sure, there aren't any explosions or disembowelments, but the story, I thought, was actually pretty riveting.

Oh, and I believe it's The "Exorcism" of Emily Rose. Not to nitpick. Good list!

RayRay said...

I'm a little late to the party, but BJ-C, this is a great list. I may disagree on the sequels to Saw, but you have shown me something with one of your picks here.

That pick is Threads. I saw this as a fourth grader on PBS, after I had seen the other two big nuclear war films of the time, The Day After [the 10 or so minute attack sequence is still bone chilling] and Testament [devastating emotionally].

Threads blows both of them away. You demonstrate wisdom far beyond you years with this inclusion.

Threads should be required viewing, just as Orwell's 1984 should be required reading.

Kudos, my lady. Kudos.

Zacery Nova said...

Another person who likes "The Happening" AND "Red Eye"...? Why can't you be a boy dammit!

Anyway, I do like some of the films you put and everyone knows that "Saw" is a modern classic, it's only the sequels (which I, for the record, didn't mind) that have diluted it a bit.

- Zac

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