Monday, May 4, 2009

the somewhat long awaited...MOVIE RECOMMENDATIONS FROM DAY OF THE WOMAN! pt. 2


This will contain some classics, some cliches, some slashers, some thrillers, some that make you feel like you need drugs, some that make you feel like you're on drugs, and some that you just may not have ever seen before. It's also going to be a continuing page. I'll probably post one every M
onday for a good while until I reach like...250 films or something. So make sure you come back soon :)

SO I BRING TO YOU... THE MOVIES BJ-C WILL TIE YOU TO A CHAIR AND MAKE YOU WATCH IF YOU COME TO VISIT HER... results may vary.


26) Fido: Zombies for Sale! For the longest time I thought this film was some sort of metaphor for the dangers of slavery...but then I told the English major side of me to shut up and enjoy the film. A perfect combination of Pleasantville and Dawn of the Dead, we see a world where you can have zombies for anything you want. Companion, milkman, sex slave, you name it! One of my favorite zombie comedies.

27) Invasion of the Blood Farmers: One of the most underrated B-Movies in my opinion.
It has its flaws like most movies, but its blood-harvesting farmers! I laughed my ass off throughout it and I'm still not 100% sure whether or not they wanted it to be funny. The idea that druids in upstate New York that dress in plaid shirts, bib overalls, and straw hats to disguise themselves as farmers is just fabulous. Best part, maybe a handful of the people were trying to be actors and get discovered, but most were just having a good time. Love It.

28) Forbidden Planet: Despite popular belief, Deep Throat is NOT the sequel to this film. It's definitely more of a sci-fi-thriller than anything, but it's an absolute classic. Anne Francis is absolutely breathtaking as Altaira Morbius. Exploring a futuristic world where we have the ability to live on other planets and that we really aren't alone in this universe, we have some Michelin Man legged robots that were totally ahead of their time. The film was done in 1956 and the robots look better than the ones in Will Smith's lame movie...Suck It CGI.

29) Cry_Wolf: I am not saying this is a GREAT horror film by any means. But the character of Dodger played by Lindy Booth, is one of the finest examples of a female mastermind I've ever seen. The storyline is based sort of around the Mafia cardgame. The point is to "avoid suspicion, lie to your friends and eliminate your enemies." When the game is taken too seriously and someone is picking victims via AIM you know shit's going down. If that isn't enough...Jon Bon Jovi has a nice role :)

30) The Dentist: Going to the dentist is scary enough, but when you add the fact he's a hallucinating psychopath....fugetaboudit. He didn't even need to show anything to freak me out. The sound of the drill and the smoke from the teeth just give me the creeps. It's such a strange film, but anytime he hallucinates a dirty, disgusting mouth...I would curl up and cringe. They even have the balls to drill a kid. Nice.

31) Tenebre: Oy. Vey. More proof that Dario Argento fucking OWNS. After dabbling around with films like Suspiria...how do you think he followed it? With this mind-blowing film. This was like Argento's best crack at being Alfred Hitchcock...only with buckets and buckets of blood. So much so, that it is included as one of the 39 "Video Nasties". Argento loves making murder as sexy as possible. He makes sure the women are always hot, and shoots them in a way that it's often weirdly sensual. Death by high heels and John Saxon included.

32) An American Werewolf in London: Some people LOVE this film, some hate it. Honestly, what do you expect from the same director that made Animal House? I'm on team Love :). I love the bits of comedy, I love the shooting scene, I love the naked running, and I LOVE Nurse Alex Price. A play on a popular monster, the film is highly entertaining. Not to mention, possesses one of the coolest soundtracks ever.

33) BUG: Created from one of my favorite plays of all time, it gives you an insight to hallucinations, and one of our most ignored fears. As long as its only one or two bugs around, it doesn't bother you...but add a ton....and all hell breaks loose. Best part about the film, is the twist that there really aren't bugs anywhere. It gives a great in-depth view into paranoia. With Peter being this whacked out dude and his girlfriend developing these same strange "bug bites" all over her body...you see how crazy love can really make you.

34) REPO! The Genetic Opera: Darren Lynn Bousman's rock-horror opera is everything I love thrown into a cup and shaken...not stirred. With a film starring one of the SPY KIDS, I had my doubts...but it blew me away. Everything about it, EVERYTHING is fabulous. I'll go ahead, and I'll say it. From the mouth of someone who has played Columbia on stage, who obsesses over everything rock-horror musical...this film IS this generation's Rocky Horror Picture Show...just wait. Midnight showings are coming...

35) Blacula: I'm sure that this doesn't need that much of an explanation. As an Italian girl living in the midwest, I'm glad the horror genre gives me a monster man to identify with. Plus, we have GAY INTERIOR DECORATORS. Awesome. While it is grossly underappreciated, it was the first recipient of "Best Horror Film" at the Saturn awards. So critics and movie snobs alike can suck it, because this movie is awesome.

36) Alucarda: "An intoxicating blend of vampirism, Satanism and lesbianism--the best cocktail to come out of Mexico since the margarita!" (B-Sol). Yep, that pretty much nails it on the head. This film is Mexican Horror at its finest. Two words: Levitating nuns. Sally Field ain't got shit on that.

37) Videodrome: Debbie "Heart of Glass" Harry. That's instantly what convinced me to see this film. It's a totally underrated David Cronenberg gem that also brought James [the high school in Family Guy is named for me] Woods into a psychological mindfuck. So ahead of its time as far as metaphorically tearing down the media; and helped solidify Cronenberg's "body horror" style.

38) The Blood On Satan's Claw: Creepily weird experimentation with witchcraft and the whole giving back to nature nonsense. Big time cult behavior and a creepy blonde girl to lead the children. I mentioned this film on my little stint about my favorite witches, so you gotta know I must love it if it's mentioned twice... There's a reason you don't mess with furry skulls with one eye... If it looks like it will possess you... it probably can.

39) Stay Alive: So I had freakishly LOW expectations for this film. It's PG-13 and friggin' Frankie (permanently 14) Munoz was starring in it. Oh, and it's based off of a video game that DOESN'T EXIST. But...I really enjoyed it. The concept was really cool and I loved how well the video game world matched up with the real world. I was pretty impressed by it and of course, Sophia Bush is steaming.

40) Bad Reputation: So you know when you walk past a movie on the Blockbuster shelf and you go "That Looks Horrible!" well, that's exactly what I said when I walked past this film. So of course, I rented it...AND LOVED IT. There's a sick beheading scene. It's your typical rape-revenge flick with that trashy teenage charm. I don't know, I have a thing for shitty films.
There's a bunch of slasher references and for a no-budget film...they do pretty well with it.

41) Slumber Party Massacre: I have no idea how this film has fallen so far under the radar as far as my generation is concerned.
This film epitomizes every cliche horror script ever thrown on the director's floor. I've been to my fair share of slumber parties, and maybe its just me, but we NEVER stripped down like they do in this film. Nor did we talk dirty on our friend's phones...and I don't use hot dogs to treat black eyes...but you get to see a whole lot of boobs, stabbing, and drilling!

42) Zombie Honeymoon: I know you have to plead "til death do you part" but this is ridiculous. After a sea-zombie vomits all over her husband, the poor wife is stuck watching the love of her life transform into a zombie. In the beginning her vegetarian husband craves meat and even flesh! Once she discovers what he is truly becoming, the broad helps him feed! Sick. :)

43) Beetlejuice: To think this film was almost called Scared Sheetless well...scares me sheetless. This is a brilliant compilation of of Tim Burton, Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder, Geena Davis, a skinny Baldwin brother, and *drools* Catherine O'Hara. The character Beetlejuice is iconic in itself, and Michael Keaton's one-liners are just amazing. Not to mention, it has the best dinner time dance scene ever.

44) Ginger Snaps Trilogy: For such a female dominated film, I'm at a loss as to why I've never shared my love for this film on here before. Chock full of female sexuality and even possible lesbian sub-text, the films themselves have a ton to bring to the table. Add the whole werewolf thing and you've got yourself a classic. I'll admit, the fact the wolf attacked her because he could smell her rag twat freaked me out. I hated walking outside during my time of the month for that very fear.

45) The People Under the Stairs: So my mom is definitely the one
who got me into horror films, but it was my "somewhat scaredy cat" father who introduced me to this one. I FLIPPED out. Granted I was like 8 but this film holds a special place in my heart. While the tag line may be long, the film does exactly what it says. It takes you into the house that your parents always told you to leave alone and the house you skipped on trick-or-treating. It also gives us Poindexter aka FOOL, who is my favorite little kid from the ghetto other than that kid from Role Models. There's just something too Flowers in the Attic that freaked me out, but its a classic.

46) Jawbreaker: Before anyone says anything, please realize that I'm well aware this film isn't a "horror" film. But like I always say, my blog-my rules. It's got murder, it's got mystery, it's got Carol Kane of When a Stranger Calls, and it's got Rose McGowan half naked...its close enough. I am freaking OBSESSED with this film. When Rose McGowan is repeated on the loudspeaker claiming "I killed Liz, I killed the teen dream...deal with it" and in cues the Sinatra music...it's like Carrie finally got her true revenge. It's just amazing. Call it comedy if you must, but its realistic and I love it.

47) The Wizard of Gore: I've never been too big of a fan of magicians. I always get the weird
deception feeling and it never really rubs me the right way. Now, this film I'll admit...isn't really up to par, but I will not deny a film with some gory ass kills. This is a film I think horror fans need to see, but don't necessarily need to see ever again. Idk...marionette torture...no thanks.


48) Hard Candy: Before she was foul-mouthed Juno, and before she was Kitty Pryde...she was 14 year old pedophile killer Haley. Normally films starring only two people tend to just lag and bore the shit out of me. This film, is like the Castaway of the horror/thriller genre. Ellen Page is MINDBLOWING in this film and contains a scene that makes most men and even some women squirm in their seats. The concept that sometimes the young prey aren't the victims is a phenemonal idea. I watch this film constantly and I doubt I'll ever grow tired of it.

49) High Tension: This film makes any idea M. Night ever came up with look like a complete joke. Granted, the film should have been put together a little better, but it was outstanding. The kills were plenty gory, the idea was great, and even though it was foreign, I never once was distracted by it. There's a scene with a death being viewed from the closet that is insane. It haunted me for a good while. Either way, this one is a must-see.

50) Dead Men Walking: While our nation is in an uproar about this Swine Flu pandemic, I'm more concerned that it doesn't turn out to be like this junk. The same way the 28 days/months films and Stephen King's The Stand exploit the whole virus outbreak thing, this film does it pretty well. It went straight to DVD which is a shame, but I'll admit...I bought it. Set in an infected prison, you get everything you'd expect from a horror film, but throw in much more gore. The amount of money they must have spent on corn syrup and latex is enough to make your head spin...



8 comment(s):

Planet of Terror said...

Good stuff BJ-C! Damn, I added some pronto to the NetFlix queue that I've never even heard of before. Bravo!

Bad Reputation is freakin' awesome. Reminds me of Day of the Woman (AKA I Spit On Your Grave) minus some of the gnarly-ness.

B-Sol said...

A bunch on here that I've never seen. Time to refill the Netflix queue. And anyone who pulls out Alucarda is OK in my book! Thanks for the credit for my line lol....

musingcontinuum said...

Jawbreaker, awesome film, not as good as Heathers, but close...

Ms Harker
www.musingcontinuum.wordpress.com

Becky said...

I'm with musingcontinuum up there. Jawbreaker is absolutely fantastic but I don't think you can really compare it with Heathers. Sure they're both about murderous teenagers and clique culture but Heathers seems to be really trying to say something while Jawbreaker is just about having fun with a campy movie. But different strokes to different folks, I suppose.

kelly m hudson said...

Sweet Jesus I love the Blood On Satan's Claw! What a weird, wonderful film. That blonde chick and her gigantice eyebrows hypnotize me with fear to this very day! Great choice!

BJ-C said...

Becky & Ms. Harker: Hey give it time! Heathers will be making an appearance, this list isn't ranked, its just sorta thrown together.

Kelly: Oh those brows...Brooke Shields has nothing on her

gord said...

Tenebrae is probably my fave Argento film, nice to see it on the list.

gord said...

Also, nice to see some Canadian horror film love. Go us!

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