Sunday, May 31, 2009

Drag Me To Hell....with Beauty Queens. [MILD SPOILERS]

So, I expected Drag Me To Hell was going to be amazing. You wanna know what that film did with my expectations? Sam Raimi took my expectations gave it a swirlie, picked it last for the dodgeball team, kicked the living heck out of it and said SCREW YOU EXPECTATIONS, I'M SAM RAIMI AND I'M ABOUT TO COLD COCK YOU. Yeah...that's about right.

I also saw Drag Me To Hell with two of my most favorite beauty queens. Miss Antioch: Melissa Zemen and Miss Lake County of Gurnee: Erin Baynes. I will be one to tell you that your audience completely makes your theatre experience. I had the perfect friends, perfect audience, perfect time, perfect atmosphere.

So we get to the theatre, hopped up on Chili's and sugar when Erin goes to save seats for Melissa and myself while our wee little bladders needed some emptying. After walking into the theater, shouting "ERIN!" to find her, we also drew the attention of some mega creeper boys. At one point Erin said something about "DRAG ME TO HELL ALREADY" or something to that affect, when one of the same smart mouth boys says "I'LL DRAG YOU TO MY BEDROOM". That was the first sign that this theater was going to be absolutely amazing.

Now, let me tell you a little bit about my two tall blondes I had with me last night. Erin is my best friend/sister/BFF/whatever you call it. Erin loves some horror films, doesn't have the chops as I do, but I'm teaching her :). So She was PUMPED to get scared, which is exactly how I am. Melissa on the other hand was freaking out about it an hour before we got to the theatre. She sat with her knees up, hands over her eyes, and wailed at everything. It was the perfect combination.

So throughout the film, Melissa is screaming her brains out, Erin is in shock of how awesome the film is, I'm laughing hysterically at all the Evil Dead similarities. When we saw that good ol' Pontiac, I'm shocked Erin and I didn't jump at the screen. So then, there's the car scene. My audience was ROARING. Erin screams, and then bursts into excitement with me, while Melissa was curling in her seat. There was a handful of "urban stereotypical" people yelling "GIRL, GET OUTTA THAT CAR! DON'T YOU BE TURNING AROUND" and some kids that got in because it's PG-13 and couldn't handle it.

So I've come to the conclusion that Sam Raimi knows exactly what will freak us out. Anytime that damn woman came on screen and gummed people or spit, or hell even opened her mouth, the audience was cringing. Whoever was the makeup artist, I salute you my friend. So anyways. The seance scene comes up and there's that laughing curtins and talking Goat and junk. I'm pinching Erin's arm going OMG IT'S JUST LIKE THE EVIL DEAD! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, IT'S JUST LIKE IT! She turns to me and goes "Brittney...SHUT. UP". I'm so suprised she didn't beat me up for every excited and stupid comment I had to make throughout the film. At one point, the film gets very quiet after what I want to say was the bedroom flying around the ceiling like NOES and Melissa says in her proud "Amber Atkins" voice..."Oh God". The audience DIES. Ooh, also. I love how the poster has been giving away the end of the movie this whole time...and no one knew. I predicted the whole "giving the coin instead of the button" thing, but I wasn't sure if it was gonna take her or Clay. Regardless....AWESOME.

My favorite part however, was the HANDkerchief. As much as I hate the little bugger for being CGI'd up the yin-yang, IT WAS ASH'S HAND. I swear on my life it's the same thing. You gotta rip it apart to stop it, and even after its been dismembered and you're crushing it, it's still squealing around like a baby pig. I could have died right then and there. So after the movie is all over, I'm in my car and Erin + Melissa are in Melissa's car. Erin had planned to stay the night instead of driving 2 hours to Rockford. I asked Melissa if she would JOIN US in a sleepover. She declines to which I look her in the eye and say "You...you shame me" It's then that she screams bloody murder and flips out.


So yes, Drag Me To Hell is 150 BILLION percent approved by not only Day of the Woman, but also The Lake County Community Pageant :). How can we not? She was a fat fair queen!

11 comment(s):

B-Sol said...

YES--not only does the poster give the ending away, but even the tagline TELLS you that Christine will be dragged to hell in three days. Raimi friggin has the balls to tell us, then does it, and it still rocks our collective worlds...

I too saw this flick in a somewhat "urban" theater, although I believe it was far more "urban" than yours, and so my moviegoing experience was slightly damaged, but not enough to take away from my shameless glee.

And the makeup FX guy, by the way, is Greg Nicotero, who is a Tom Savini/George Romero disciple and basically the top guy in the biz today. And also, the 2008 Cyber-Horror Award winner for Best Makeup :-)

BJ-C said...

I assumed he would be someone fantab. I however was WAY too exhausted to look it up when I wrote this post :)

Planet of Terror said...

Totally agreed, the crowd involved is definitely essential to the watching experience. It made for one of the best times I've had at the theaters in a looooong time (horror movie or otherwise).

An instant classic for sure. Can't wait to see this again!

B-Movie Becky said...

I had tons of fun with this one too. Great mix of laughs, cringes, and jumps.

B-Sol said...

I agree Becky, the perfect mix!

CSY said...

Hubby, a friend and I went to see it opening night here in Tally...I don't want to see another horror movie on opening night...EVER again! My audience TOTALLY ruined it! Of course, I who DO NOT scream at movies, is ashamed to admit that there were times during this movie that had me screaming and clutching...again, I am NOT a screamer or clutcher. But to me, ANY movie that kills a kid in the first few minutes is an AWESOME movie! I. LOVED. IT.

T.L Bugg said...

My wife and I got to see Drag To to Hell the last day before I left town for a week (because otherwise it would have drove me nuts), and I have to echo your sentiments. I really enjoyed the film, and I usually don't like a flick that relies so heavily on jump scares. However Sam pulled it off perfectly and it was a great return to form.

Also best line : I'm gonna get some!

BJ-C said...

TL Bugg- Mine was "Did I get any in my mouth?!" I almost peed. It was amazing. ps: i want to put an image link of your blog on my sidebar, got one you're willing to send me? *bats eyelashes*

T.L Bugg said...

Well seeing as you batted your eyelashes and all. Sure I'll send you one. Not sure that I have anything on my laptop, so I'll have to send it when I get back in town at the end of the week. Until then, greeting from New Orleans.

uniquetravels said...

I compeltely agree with everyone's comments above. I saw it with a friend of mine who was jumping out of her seat, and clutching my arm while i laughed my ass off at the whole thing.
So much like Evil Dead, I was cheering!
The only disappointing part was that Bruce Campbell was not in it anywhere. Booooo....

B-Sol said...

Very true. I think had the movie been made 20 years ago, there's no doubt the leading man would've been Campbell. The part almost seemed to be written for him. Oh well, at least we got the Oldsmobile Delta Royale...

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