HORROR PORN...BUT THE FUN KIND!

Not every film in the "horror/porn" genre has to be this twisted adaptation of necrophilia and things of the sort. Sometimes, we have films with a good amount of porn/horror and no creepy-ness or feelings of regret or that need to shower feeling afterwards!


So, as my readers know, I have the occasional episodes of actually expressing my small appreciation for super femininity. I in no way ever condone women being recognized simply for their outer appearance, but i'll admit...I have a thing for nude models. I absolutely love pin-up girls, burlesque dancers, call-girls, and playboy playmates. Now, not because I'm some subconscious lesbian or anything, I just personally adore them. Why you may ask? Well, I can't answer that...just understand that I have a weird fascination with them. I think its the fact that these are women that I feel are breaking the feminist mold. They're not subjecting themselves or their bodies, they're models. Just models aiming towards a very specific audience The Girls Next Door (Hugh Hefner's favorite girlfriends) bringing the novel The Telling to life as a horror film. Not only are these foxy ladies starring in the film, but Bridget Marquardt is producing it! So I highly doubt this film is going to be coming of age, nor will it have absolutely brilliant acting, but I promise you I will add this film to my collection simply because it has playboy playmates in it. Plus, another producer, (B-Movie superstar Sherri Strain) is on the credits so I'm sure it won't be completely terrible. I'm not expecting much from it, but I know that my weird taste in films will probably enjoy it.

So Jenna Jameson is undoubtedly the worlds greatest porn star of the modern age. When she announced that she was going to close her legs for good, America was absolutely mortified. BUT! When I had thought all hope was lost to ever see Jenna again...she completely redeems herself! Zombie Strippers is one of my favorite movies. It's entertaining, it has zombies, AND naked women. Not to mention, Robert Englund! How can you have a movie with Freddy Kruger and the Queen of Porn and NOT obsess over it?

So you know when you were a kid and you used to visit the "Old Ma & Pa Video Store"? The ones with half eating VHS cases, and a selection of films hidden behind a curtain of beads to keep the children out of? Well, the video store I frequented had the horror films as well as the porn films in the same section, which means anything that was even remotely close to either of the genre's was thrown into this closet. That's when I was introduced to She-Wolves of the Wasteland.(More commonly referred to as Phoenix, the Warrior). While the film doesn't star any porn stars of the GND, or Jenna Jameson stature, the film is fabulously terrible. The premise is that an evil princess in the not-too-distant future in a world completely overrun by scantily clad, leather heaving women, impregnates one of her subjects from a sperm bank. The reasoning is to give birth to a male child for the princess to sacrifice...HELLO AMAZING! Not to mention, the star of the film is Kathleen Kinmont! I'm an avid watcher of "horrible" B-Movies, and this is one of my absolute favorites. It's like Xena: Warrior Princess without the bad bangs.

So back to the porn stars with zombies genre...2007 made ZOMBIES ZOMBIES ZOMBIES: STRIPPERS VS. ZOMBIES. It finally answers that burning question of "If there was a zombie outbreak while I was at a gentlemen's club tossing dollars on women doing things I wish my wife could do...would I make it out alive?" The answer is within this film, and it is absolutely FABULOUS. There is nothing better than hot babes with chainsaws and guns going after the brain craving undead. The acting may not be oscar-worthy, but who really cares? It's beautiful women, bashing the heads in of zombies!!! This movie is great for fans of B&B (blood & boobs). Did I mention Tiffany Shepis is in this?